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About this blog

A collection of items meant to enhance your life. Motivational speeches, House Keeping, Dieting, Stories of both sadness and humor, and poems. 

 

Entries in this blog

My signatures are an integral part of fotp history, and I will list them below.

It’s hot outside and sit on my porch, sucking a popsicle. It’s cherry flavor, their favorite flavor was always cherry. I sit and reminisce about the times we spent together. And I don’t feel  sad, because those memories bring me happiness. I finish up my popsicle just as they call me inside, they’re still here with me. But I still think about our memories, so that I’ll nver forgot them when they’re gone. I sometimes wish we lived forever. Just look at world now, Normani is gone, Ally is gone, Dinah is gone, Lauren is gone, and I’m still standing. My name is Camila Cabello, and I want to take you on a journey through the development and creation of my most personal album yet, simply titled M(e)ila. Put your safety goggles on now, this is where the darkness comes to light...

_______________________________

I was on various drugs when I chose this username, and now I must suffer the consequence of it. This is not a publicity stunt, I’m actually worried for my mental health. Please if anyone is reading this, please help me. Please buy Charmbracelet on iTunes , you know the shtick. Send me receipt verification, and then I’ll get better. Please, please, please do this for your friendly neighborhood troll, I know you want to see more of me in this upcoming year. Please do this for me and help me, and help him.

__________________________________

It was unusually chilly this Halloween night. I had decided to attend one of my towns infamous Halloween party’s that night, and was enthralled. The party was excellent, lots of people had really great costumes and I had gone as a pirate. The party was on the outskirts of my small town a little whiles away in the wood. I had drunkily dozed off in One the tents, and when I had awoken everyone had already gone. I checked my phone and it was around 1am. I only had 3% battery so I had about enough to make one call, I decided to try my local taxi service, Brocka Taxis. My town was very small, and at the time didn’t have Uber or Lift. Luckily, they picked up and said I was lucky I had called as they were doing their last drives of the night. They said the wait would be around 30 minutes so I waited in silence. My phone died shortly after the call, I stood by the street I walked to in the cold. I watched my breath in the freezing air to pass the time. A little time after, I saw the headlights of a car begin to materialize in the distance. I waved my hands and they honked on notice. The slowly pulled up to me and I read the little motto I had come to know. “Brocka Taxis, We’ll never say never!”. I was glad at that time, cause if they could I’d be stranded here. I got in the taxi and was greeted to a rather good looking women in her late 20s. I said hi and introduced myself just to be cordial, she replied back “Hello, I’m Brandy, where are you headed?”. My stomach dropped and I almost gasped. “Excuse me what did you say?”, I questioned nervous. “I said Hi, I’m Brandy, where are you headed?”, she replied with a slight giggle at the end. I saw her shoot me deathly glare in the rear view mirror along with a taunting smile. Desperate, I told her my location, she smiled and what she said next to me stunned me. “Ah, I know where that is, we’ll have to take the freeway though, that sound good?”. She smiled with that again, I shuddered. We sat in silence for minutes, even though they felt like hours, as she awaited my response. I gathered all the courage I had in me and replied, “No, no thank you actually”. She chuckled slightly to herself, and unlocked the doors, I had no idea she had even locked them. I got out and immediately started walking back the other direction, I heard her start to drive along side me and I held my head down. “You have a safe night” she said as she drove on off. I looked up shortly after and the car was gone, not a skid mark or anything just vanished. It was a long dark walk home that night, my only company the Full moon. 

__________________________________

My sweet sweet nana loves gays, but gays like me, you see. I’m normal, my nana loves me because I don’t act like a typical gay. One day my nana saw to gays kissing on tv, she turned the channel and whispered a silent prayer to God, “damn them to hell god, and abomination”. I giggled, it’s ok my sweet nana loves gays, gays like me. Another time I recall, my nana was walking to the store and saw to young teen boys holding hands, “Disgusting!” She screamed, the ran out of embarrassment. She told me when she got home, I lightly chucked to myself this time, my sweet nana loves gays, gays like me. One day I was in my room, dancing around to toxic, when my nana barged with laundry, “what the fuck are you doing! Come pray with me now!”, i was embarrassed,  but I was acting weird. So we prayed, and she’s looked at me a little funny since. But i guess it’s ok, my nana loves gays, gays like me? 

____________________________________

Ugh, I dread the day I turn 30. I know it’s so so far away, but it scares me. That’ll be the day my life ends, I’ll be a old fart rocking in chair by the fireplace reminiscing about how things used to be. Mariah Carey will be playing on the radio, no nevermind, it’ll be playing on whatever music technology my grandkids leave for me on table. They’ll barely visit their poor old grandpa. Every second will feel like years as I await my imminent death. Those below the age of 25 will laugh at me as I leave my house to get the mail. Spitting in my face, calling me a “old fag”. I’ll run, no limp, back into the house using my walker. I’ll cry, and wait until mother Mariah calls me back to the Lovely Place to live with her for all eternity. Where she lives there’s no beginning and there is no end, and it’ll feel like you’re dreaming, but you won’t be sleeping. 

Sayguh

Without you I am destitute

Always losing

So much to prove

I wonder what will I do

When you decide to choose

Will take me when you leave

Or leave me lonely

Endless time to grieve 

My love is yours 

It is my will

Until you choose

My time stands still

It is so cold

My heart of gold

It’s getting old

@Saiga please pick 

Saiga, Saiga?

Saved me from myself

Always kept me well

Indifferent to my flaws

Got me through my hell

Although I never see him

I wish I could believe him

When he told me

We would always be together

Two peas in a pod

Together for forever

Thicker than thieves

Unaffected by the weather

Two of a kind

Birds of a feather

Saiga, Saiga?

Where are you?

Saiga, Saiga?

Come home boo...

Saiga, Saiga?

Where are you? 

Saiga, Saiga?

I miss you, oh

Saiga, Saiga?

Saiga, Saiga...

Please come home.

A song for Sylk

I wrote this song for my abusive ex @Sylk, it took me 7 months to write, and it will be on my debut FOTP album, Tales of a Imperfect Pooh , this song is called

“Hurt People Love”

I’m laughing through the pain

And that hurts you

I’m waiting out the clock

It’s gonna work boo!

Watch the seconds turn to minutes

Hurry up hun will you finish!

 

You ain’t never gonna keep me down

Take a swing and it comes back around

Around on this cycle, we call love

Always chasing no matter how fast I run

I keep going, my eyes on the sun

It’s round like this cycle, we call love

 

Sit down and play pretend 

He’s taking notes

Eyes centered and don’t laugh

It’s not a joke

We’re both wearing masks

Mine cause I’m sad

And yours cause you’re glad?

 

You ain’t never gonna keep me down

Take a swing and it comes back around

Around on this cycle, we call love

Always chasing no matter how fast I run

I keep going, my eyes on the sun

It’s round like this cycle, we call love

 

The damage is done

Now leave me alone

You’ve finally won

Take your trophy and go

But I know 

Yours feeling weren’t all show...

 

You ain’t never gonna keep me down

Take a swing and it comes back around

Around on this cycle, we call love

Always chasing no matter how fast I run

I keep going, my eyes on the sun

It’s round like this cycle, we call love

 

Like this cycle, we call love

This cycle, we call love

Round like this cycle, we call love

Call love

Call love

Call

Call...

A poem for Frozen

He’s melting into nothing

It’s gonna take some time

Slowly the clock is ticking

Let me pull out some wine

Let’s talk about the chaos 

All the discrepancies

It seems it’s gonna take

Much more than you and me

To stop the hypocrisy

That no one seems to notice

And even if they do

They hardly seem to show it

 I feel that I am lost

Just drifting on the ocean

Trying to find my way

I wish I had the potion

That would make everyone realize

That you are meant to be

Kindness and fairness

Something that’s close to me

I try to keep on going

Amidst all of this muddle

But I fear when I look back

You’ll only be a puddle

 

For my dear pal, @Frozen

A poem for Dr.Slay

Um...

Dr.Slay

I think you’re really cool

And I just wanted say 

Hey

And do you still like Gaga?

Applause is her best song

And when it comes on the radio

That beat really goes off

But I’m sure that you knew that

I mean you do Stan talent 

You speak English so fluent

Sylks tits are not congruent 

But mine are

and that makes me superior 

So @Dr. Slay

This is me just saying 

Hey

Sincerely, NicoleRichiePurpleHair.jpg (: 

Omg I never really like zelda

I used to have a Nintendo 

but i never got any games on it

i liked that you could send people messages

if you were close enough to eachother 

Zelda goes off in Super Smash Bros though

Dins Fire goes across the map 

For easy wig snatching

Farore’s Wind goes in when you fall offstage 

I just don’t like that bitches ears

like are you a elf

she can probably hear my ass right now

 

Sincerely, 

My dearest friend HerGrace, @Hylia

Left me hurt

Abused 

treated me like dirt

and used

me for my resources

ate me alive

They dined on many courses

im sick 

of lies

all they do

is try 

to bully me into submission

but I’ve made my decision 

I won’t fall down

stay on the ground

no small hiccup

will keep me from getting up

Its time to make a new start

One of Ariana’s best

@TattooedHeart

 

A poem for Saiga

I can’t wait to visit Chile

i just hope it isn’t chilly

We’ll sit and eat our phillys

With my goat his name is billy

and when we are done, we’ll go inside

play hide seek, you’ll seek I’ll hide

The smell of marijuana 

Mariah is better than Madonna

To my lover, @Saiga

❤️❤️❤️

Kii

@Frozen how are you doing? Are you being the HBIC in charge like I told you? Are you making these hoes pressted?1?1 Are Ash in My wig and Them mass downvoting you? If so good. Continue to spread impact and talent across the forum. The Lounge, HOW, NHB everywhere. You are the only one talented enough to do it. 

I’m currently typing this while drinking a Pina Colada on the beach. I’m here in Hawaii with my boyfriend. He’s a lawyer, so he has money. I hope everyone is enjoying fotp, I hope everyone is ok. 

Sincerely, knickoleritchypearlpelhear.jaypeg

lololol

Happy meen gurls day.

As a last ditch trolling effort I've set preset a number of blogs to auto post over the next few years, all blogs contain a mass tag!

You will all suffer!

xoxo Winnie wub1 

A fitting end

I have news. 

 I have successfully made a account on ATRL. Yes, it is true. I will now be moving to ATRL permanently. I know you will all miss me, and I will miss you all too. But it is for the best. I feel very out of place her. I know a lot of people like me. But I feel like I'm become increasingly more unpopular and hated. A select few group of members, always  posting and being rude. 

I try not to let it get to me. But sometimes it does. And so I'm leaving, and hopefully everyone on ATRL will be nice. To the newer and older members on here. I wish you luck, and a tip. Do not gain access to NHB. A select group of older members are trying to make it a true hell hole. Where they can say anything they want, and cyber bully people. All while hiding under the guise of "You knew what you got yourself into". It's really sad.

I tried to calm down the vileness in NHB. And was successful for a while. But a few keep trying to keep it alive. Every time I go in there, there is always something negative about me. Every time I make a thread the first posts are always something negative. 

I'm labeled a troll, when all I actually wanna do is make people laugh. That's what I first visited this site for. Amusement. Granted I did sometimes go overboard. My crazy HOW threads and Lounge threads. Not hate. Not bullying. The anonymity the internet provides, has made some people incredibly inconsiderate and rude. 

A little more news before I go. I was actually 36. That is true. So for all you people who always made fun of me for being "a 40 year old creep". You were close. But I'm no creep. I was just a normal person looking to find friends on this forum. I'm sure many of you could relate.

I think this is all I had to say. This will be my last blog, hell, my last post on this site. My first thread I was just kidding, but after thinking. I think this choice is the best for me. Goodbye Fotp, it was a good 2 years.

 

Sincerely, Jacob. yep, that is my real name. 

 

 

 

A new beginning

  I know I haven't posted a blog in a while. However, I feel now is the perfect time to reignite the old dwindled flames. I have just undergone a major transformation. All of my time spent here, has led up to this. Hopefully this will be the final step into achieving my true goal, and ultimate self realization. 

  There was WinnieThePooh and there was Winniedeng. Both contrasting aspects of myself. One kind, and one wicked. For years I battled with the inner workings of my mind. Longing to achieve a balance in myself. It's not until I took the time, to actually look into a mirror, and see my face. Did I realize what I actually had to do. 

  This is the final step, I think. NicoleRichiePurpleHair.jpg will be the final step into achieving nirvana. It will a complete and harmonious balance between Winniedeng. and WinnieThePooh. At least I hope so. I've been calculating up until this day. Waiting for the perfect moment to initiate such a drastic and irreversible change.  My heart tells me I made the right decision, and my brain says to listen to my heart. I want to believe this is the perfect plan. But you know what they say...

 

When men plan, God laughs.

Two Sisters

 

   The sun rose in the west today, and settled in the east. At least that's what I've came to believe, I'm not very good with directions. Every day the position changes, I don't know if this is abnormal, or if this is a usual occurrence. But it intrigues me, and leads me to think of certain thoughts, those more abstract than my usual. 

    I have two sisters, that I live with. A small Apple, named Asha, and a larger Coconut, named Iselder. I do not know their genders, and I wish not to pick for them. I feel like they would be mad at me. If they could feel emotions, that is. But sadly they are only fruits. 

   It gets lonely here in my small town, not much a town I suppose. The population never rises. It's been "3", for a while now, Me, Asha, and Iselder. I don't like Iselder very much, sometimes I feel like she is a more of a burden. Asha tells me that I can fix my issues with Iselder, but I don't think I can. Whenever, I'm around her, more so when she is around me, I feel tired. Even though I am tired, she never goes away. 

   Today, Iselder had me bound to my bed. She didn't even let me get up a take a shower or anything! My days recently have been extremely unproductive, hardly nothing gets done. Even menial tasks, like personal hygiene. 

   Asha occupied much of my time today, when I'm with her I get things done I like it. I nurture her, and take care of her as much as I can. Iselder gets jealous, but she leaves me alone when I'm with Asha. They've never seemed to like eachother, despite living with me all my life. Well, maybe not all my life. I've known Asha for as long as I can remember, but Iselder seemed to have just appeared on day. Iselder always lingers in the background, when I spend time with Asha. I'm always thinking of her.

   Asha and Iselder have been arguing a lot lately, it saddens me, but at the same time brings me joy. I like to see Asha stand up to Iselder, and defend me when I am subjected to her abuse. I feel like something big will happen. 

   I had set Asha and Iselder on the counter today, while I went for a walk. When I can back, Iselder was on the floor. Cracked. Her insides spilling onto the carpet at my feet. Asha looked at me, I looked back. I embraced her in a warm hug, a single tear trickling down my face. Iselder's passing was a relief, I hate to admit it. But she was just too much of a burden. 

   The next day when I awoke to a new feeling. A feeling of purpose, and the initiative to fulfill that purpose. A sudden burst of energy. And I felt that same feeling the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and the next. 

     

Discovery

Longing

For love has been my occupation

Dissapointment 

Occured much to my vexation 

But suddenly 

Something took me higher in flight

Ascended from the darkness

Quickly rising to the light

No clue what I wanted

My endeavors I flaunted 

I grew sick of the games

Sudden enlightenment 

In the absence of joy 

I found out

I loved a boy 

 

Eggs Shells

I'm encased inside a solid shield 

No entrance for you

No exit for me

These walls I see are always the same

So plain, and dull, a stunning white 

I wanna be free

But I need some help

By Kindess, or by force either will suffice 

I want to reveal the contents

But I'm afraid 

I say I'm gonna leave

But I come back 

Just tap me a couple more times

Make my shell crack 

 

A poem for myself by myself 

 

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