Hi. Nice to meet you. My name is Jenna, a female trainer. I just moved to Littleroot Town in the Hoenn region of Pokemon. After arriving, I went and introduced myself to my neighbour. A sexist twat of a boy. His name was Brendan or something; the son of some professor in the area. I'll be having words with him about his son's sexist attitude when I meet him. Offering to catch me a Pokemon coz I'm a girl and can't manage it myself. Well fuck you too. Swiftly after, and without wasting a moment, I left that dump, and went out into the wild. Route 101, I believe. I heard a scream. Some little girl must be in danger... oh wait no it was some grown up man. He was getting chased by some little dog Pokemon; a Poochyena I think they're called. Man up bruh.
Not long after, the man saw me and asked me to help him. He said he would give me a Pokemon if I did, and I could take whichever one I wanted from his basket. This was my time. I was finally going to get a Treecko! I ran over to his basket and inside were 3 Poke Balls. You would think he'd label these fucking things wouldn't you? I chose the middle one because why not tbh. Shouting like a lunatic, I threw the pokeball which collided with the man's forehead. It fell to the ground and opened. My Pokemon emerged. Wait. That's not treecko. What the fuck? It's some stupid chicken. I told her to use Absorb. She did nothing. What the fuck is wrong this chicken? The man told me the chicken was a fire type Pokemon and could only use Scratch, Growl and Ember. This is fucking stupid, this is. Oh well, roast chicken use Ember. The Poochyena ran away like a little bitch. Yeah, I won!
I then followed the man back into Littleroot Town. It turns out he was the Pokemon professor. That also means he was the father of that sexist idiot. It turns out his father isn't actually so bad. He thanked me for rescuing him, and then told me to keep the chicken. He said her name was Torchic. Fuck this, I don't want a Torchic. I WANT A TREECKO! He then said he wanted to apologise for his son's behaviour, so asked if I would go to Route 103 to haul him back. Why not? I thought, maybe he'll give me the treecko if I do that. And so my journey began.
I once again left Littleroot Town, in search of this idiot boy. Passing through Route 101, I encountered a wild Wurmple [NB: this encounter is scripted so regardless of what happens, this will always be the first encounter]. Hey, I guess my fire chicken will come in handy. I threw its Poke Ball and told it to burn the bug. Another insect trampled. Not long after, I arrived in Oldale Town. Which way to the club? Suddenly a man walks towards me. This must be the welcoming committee. He gives me 10 potions for free and tells me to visit the Pokemon Center and the Poke Mart. Eh, I'll think about it later. Ditching!
After what felt like 10 hours (but was probably 10 minutes), I arrived in Route 103. There were some ledges in the way so I had to run through the long grass. I encountered a Purrloin. What an interesting Pokemon. I told KFC to attack with ember. But that pussy was fast. It scratched at my chicken's wing. Suddenly I noticed something, my KFC had the ability Speed Boost. I told KFC to attack once again. This time, she out-sped the kitty and roasted her. I decided this would be a good time to return to Oldale Town. I healed my chicken in the Pokemon Center, and took a stop by the Mart. They said their Poke Ball supplier was delayed and would only arrive later this afternoon. I hope I don't run into any Water-Type Pokemon soon.
Returning to Route 103, I made my way up to that kid. Do you know what he said? As soon as I approached him, he mocked me and said he was surprised I even made it this far. This absolute bitch. I'll show him. We agreed on having a Pokemon battle. He said he would go easy on me, and I told him to shove it. "Go chicken" I shouted. Torchic burst out from her Poke Ball ready to use the boy as a scratching post. Suddenly, we saw this blue thing emerging from the other side of the field. Oh, great! a Water-type Pokemon! Torchic tried her best but ended up getting absolutely wrecked by this water fish thing that kept spamming Water Gun. [NB: Drayano hack. He made Brendan's starter level 6 and gave it the STAB move. You have to grind to beat him.] I gave up and told Torchic to return. The boy said he would wait there and I could challenge him and lose any time I felt ready. Oh it was ON!
After healing Torchic in Oldale Town, I realised we had to do some training. This kid was cheating by having a type advantage but I was gonna show him who the weakling was! I went back up to Route 103 and decided to find some wild Pokemon, and beat them to a pulp. Along the way, I encountered Fletchling, Bunnelby, Bellsprout, Hoothoot, and Spearow. Torchic gained some experience and learned a new move; Sand Attack. I then encountered another water type; Shellos. Torchic had little health left, but this was a good test of strength. Even blinded by Mud-Slap, my little chicken clawed her way to victory, and learnt the move Peck in the process. I was so proud of her.
Now, we were ready. I returned to the boy's side and challenged him to another battle. He wasn't prepared for me this time. My strategy was simple. I'll use Sand Attack on the Mudkip and when it can't attack, I'll peck it till it faints. Simple and effective. It all started so well. Torchic used Sand Attack causing Mudkip to miss his Water Gun. After three sand attacks, I was ready to move to the offensive... or would have been if the Mudkip didn't start growling at my little chicken. We had to find a new plan, so we settled on range attacks with Ember. It was a difficult battle. Mudkip eventually gained a torrent boost and was able to hit Torchic with a Water Gun, but my little baby held on. Torchic finished the battle with one final Ember. I had won! Yeah fuck you too bitch.
After gloating and lecturing the kid, I told him that his father needed to see him. We returned to the lab together. (Well actually he ran ahead of me, but I liked to think he learned his lesson). As I return to the lab on my own, I see the professor and the kid. The kid looked upset and I knew he got punished. The professor then told me he had a gift for me. He said if I wanted a different starter, I could have one. I really did want a Treecko but I just couldn't do it. I'd grown so attached to my little Torchic that I just wouldn't let her go. Instead, the professor told me to take the Pokedex he had conveniently placed on his desk. I thought he'd maybe taken it away from his son, but alas, no, he ordered it for himself. Oh well. The kid re-introduced himself as Brendan and apologised to me directly, giving me some Poke Balls as a sort of parting gift. Obviously, being a classy girl I accepted them, turned around and left without a word.
My journey was about to begin, I said goodbye to my mother; knowing full well if I didn't she'd call me every two seconds of the day. She told me I could always come home, and I said that wasn't necessary. Afterwards, I was excited to catch my first Pokemon! (well, not including my darling Torchic). As I was about to enter a patch of long grass, Brendan came running up to me. What did this kid want now? He said he didn't think I accepted his apology (well, at least he's not as dumb as he looks), and that he wanted to install the DexNav function on my PokeNav. I reluctantly accepted when he said it would help me find rare Pokemon. He then showed me how to work it. We crept up on the tail of a Pokemon and suddenly, my first Pokemon had appeared!
A Poochyena? A fucking Poochyena? Are you serious? RARE POKEMON? My ass! Without too much of an effort, I was able to catch it. Brendan and I then split our separate ways as he said he would see me again. That's one promise I'm sure he would keep... unfortunately. I decided to stay about in Route 101 and see if there were any actual rare Pokemon about. Obviously, to no avail. I found another Poochyena. Wanting to see if this 'rare' Poochyena was any use whatsoever, I told it to attack. I was shocked by what just happened. It used ICE FANG? Well now, that was exciting. I used the Pokedex and found out that Poochyena doesn't usually learn that move, but that it was an egg move. Very interesting. This could come in handy then. It wasn't long until the opposing Poochyena had run away.
Wanting to see what other Pokemon lay in wait in Route 101, I ran around in the long grass battling whatever I could find. My encounters included Caterpie, Lillipup, Pidgey (all of which I caught), Zigzagoon and Starly. I was about to give up on hope. As I approached the exit for Oldale Town, I found one more Pokemon. It was a ZORUA! WHAT? I was so catching that! I had the Poochyena use Ice Fang and then threw a Poke Ball at the Zorua, catching it within 3 shakes of the ball. I was overwhelmed with joy and went back on my travels. Arriving in Oldale Town, I healed my team and then deposited all my Pokemon into the computer, keeping only Torchic and Zorua.
It was time to continue my journey. I embarked onto Route 102 where I would encounter some new wild Pokemon. These included Rattata, Surskit, Lotad, Seedot, Ralts, Houndoor, Sentret and Tympole. After fighting against all of these, Zorua finally gained some experience and learned the move Feint Attack. I was finally ready to take on some trainers. First up was Youngster Calvin who was training Zigzagoon, Pidove and Bunnelby. My Zorua was able to pierce through all of his defenses with his newly acquired Feint Attack. My next enemy was a Bug Catcher, who used Wurmple. Unfortunately this Wurmple decided it would be a nice gesture to poison my Zorua with Poison Sting. No matter. After some excavating, I found a berry plant which contained some Oran and Pecha Berries... yeah this would have come in handy like five minutes ago! Finally as I approached the next town, I was challenged by Lass Tiana. She sent out this grass / flying Pokemon known as Hoppip. It was easy to beat but it was so adorable, I just had to have one. I spent the next 10 minutes of my journey looking in the route for a Hoppip, only to realise it didn't appear on the DexNav as a silhouette so was evidently not in this area. [NB: After checking the documents, it seems Hoppip can be found in Route 101. I've already moved forward so I'm not going back just to get it. I have my eyes on another grass type for next episode anyway.]
FINALLY! I had arrived in Petalburg City, and was about to meet my father for the first time in god knows however many years. As I arrived as the gym, we shared a hug for a few seconds until some little boy wandered in. Dad... is there something you'd like to explain? Apparently, I was jumping to conclusions (I do that a lot, huh?) and this boy was simply wanting help to catch a Pokemon. My dad loaned him a Zigzagoon to help him catch a Pokemon and told me to go with the boy. Who does he think he is? My father? Oh wait. Eh, well I guess it couldn't hurt. I went with the young boy, who called himself Wally. This lucky bugger found himself a Ralts on his first try. That's it! He can join me anytime if he gives me some of that encounter luck! He was also able to catch the Pokemon on his first try. I bode Wally farewell and returned to the gym with Zigzagoon. I challenged my father but he declined, saying I was not strong enough since he heard I got beat by Brendan once (fuck, who told him that. MOM!!!) He then told me to go to Rustboro City first and take on Roxanne, the gym leader there. Then after I received four badges, I could challenge him. So high-maintenance! I returned back to the Pokemon Center and slept there for the night. He wouldn't even let me sleep in the gym. What an ass!
- Level 13 - Scratch, Leer, Extrasensory, Feint Attack
- Level 13 - Scratch, Peck, Ember, Sand Attack