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Heart breaks sucks!!!



We've all been through dates and such and then end up finding that one person you have great connections with who end up breaking up with you in the end. Then you go and ask yourself "DO I EVEN HAVE THE WILL TO LIVE?!" well let's not go that far. I always go out on dates whether its a guy or girl and eventually i saw this girl and my GOD she was the most beautiful being i ever seen. Her smile could light up a giant room from 100 miles away and can have such a contagious smile it can make anybody's day. Anyways, when i first laid my eyes on her my breath was taken away from my lungs i thought i was gonna have asthma (lol). When i first approached her MAAAAN i was making a fool of myself but hey at least she said yes when i asked her out so that's gotta count for something. Anyways, for a few days me and her were dating i couldnt help but get crazy about her but i try not to even though i can excessively call her or text her and sometimes stalk her instagram and snapchat (she didnt make me this way i was always crazy) so yea i gotten a little crazy but fortunately i was lucky she even liked crazy girls. The first time she broke up with me, i was seriously out of control and the break up only lasted for one day and that's when we got back together again after she realized that she made a mistake and realized how much i meant to her and that me and her just decided to get married in the future and i know what you're thinking "why the hell would you even think about doing that?" well i was stupid so there really isnt a straight up answer i just wasnt thinking right. Anyways, our relationship only lasted for 3 months so it wasn't very long and then she broke up with me the second time and at that time i didn't lose control or anything i was very calm but at the same time i was heart broken. So after a few days of me being single i decided to do one night stands with different women but i gotta tell you like litterally sex isnt everything and it isnt always going to put two people together automatically because it can destroy a person's well being and what people dont understand (and i wasnt thinking of it at the time) is that sex should be between you and the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. Sex is a beautiful thing but people tend to abuse it and it ends up turning into something ugly. Anyways, i was turning into a complete hot mess of myself like honestly i forgot how to have self control...you know what i mean right? i was acting crazy doing all these terrible things to myself it was a total wreck. Anyways, so we broke up and at that point i just wanted to give up because women are terrible and dont get me wrong im a woman too and im also terrible so i do believe that terrible people shouldnt be together but at least i can make an effort to be loyal and to stay with that person because i know how much i mean to that person and that they mean so much to me. i honestly feel bad for all the good men that try to be there for their girl and their girl is so ungrateful so they decided to leave them i know those guys dont wanna be gay or anything i just wish they have a sign to tell them which girl to take and which girl not to take. Im still struggling to actually move on but im only human so its going to take me a while to detach myself from my ex love. If anyone else is having trouble moving on just hmu and we can get through this together.


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