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Finished writing a song, feedback please 😊

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Chorus
Don't tell me "I'll make a man out of you"
Lookie here at what these soft hands can do
Don't tell me "I'll make a man out of you"
Lookie here at what these soft hands can do
 
Verse One
As a bushy-tailed lad
I had high hopes of becoming
A broad shoulder man
Wasn't the son my mama wanted
Too soft were my hands
 
Pre-Chorus
Papa taught me how
To toughen up
Boys, they play rough
To muster up the strength
To build a white picket fence
(Lookie here!)
 
Chorus
Don't tell me "I'll make a man out of you"
Lookie here at what these soft hands can do
Don't tell me "I'll make a man out of you"
Lookie here at what these soft hands can do
 
Post-Chorus
These soft hands can do
These soft hands can do
These soft hands can do
(Can do, can do)
 
Verse Two
As a pint-sized tyke I grew
And my hopes they dwindled
I swang high as I could
And saw the stars twinkle
With my two soft hands
 
Pre-Chorus
 
Chorus
 
Post-Chorus
 
Bridge
Ma and pa
I'm not one to pick the crops
I'd rather pop up shop
But I haven't a soul left to be sold
 
Middle-Eight
Don't tell me I'll, don't tell me I'll (You!)
Don't tell me I'll, don't tell me I'll (You!)
Don't tell me I'll, don't tell me I'll (You!)
Don't tell me I'll, don't tell me I'll (You!)
 
Chorus
 
Post-Chorus
 
Outro
Looked here!
 
 
 
 
 
 
I wrote wrote this song about how traditionalist and toxic the concept of masculinity is. There's lyrics reflecting on how I grew up being a gay kid in Nebraska, a conservative, religious state. There is a folk-pop, electronic soul to this song. It's my anthem for the LGBTQ community and women, all those harmed by an outdated belief system. Please let me know your thoughts.
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Chorus Don't tell me "I'll make a man out of you" Lookie here at what these soft hands can do Don't tell me "I'll make a man out of you" Lookie here at what these soft hands can do

Good job, keep it up, i love how it felt genuine and straight from the heart, i can tell you're passionate about the topic.  


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