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Kyoteki

Sam Smith changes their pronouns to they/them

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7 hours ago, Miss Show Business said:

I just never understood this... Let me just keep quiet and continue scrolling dead7

There’s a ton of resources out there if you’re at all confused. We’re living in a very modern world now so I’d suggest a quick googling session to acclimate yourself with it. 

After reading some of the disappointing replies in this thread I’d suggest the same for most of the people commenting. 

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4 hours ago, Sean said:

... ok @ the responses in this thread 

 

while on the topic; why do people want more queer representation but the minute there is some they get slammed lol

 

good for him anyway

Spill a bit sis

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On 9/13/2019 at 10:15 PM, Courtney Love said:

There’s a ton of resources out there if you’re at all confused. We’re living in a very modern world now so I’d suggest a quick googling session to acclimate yourself with it. 

After reading some of the disappointing replies in this thread I’d suggest the same for most of the people commenting. 

I agree I am part of the people who do not understand, even when told. I have learned to respect decisions, even though I do not understand it. I always am happy that people are discovering themselves.

However, personally, I view it as putting themselves in another gender box to escape another. Like they see themselves as both masculine and feminine, so non binary exists, but in reality. ... Boxes shouldn't exist period. You can be a male and dress feminine and not be called "Non Binary" and vice versa. 

Idk maybe I need more understanding of what non-binary is. 

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wendy4 He uses his hips in one music video and suddenly he's "them" wendy4

I'm so done with this non-binary fad which ensures that male and female stereotypes keep going strong wendy4

We need more "effeminate" men and "masculine" women in the media to help all of us break out of the pigeonholes we are put into from birth wendy4

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On 9/19/2019 at 12:16 PM, Modern Woman said:

wendy4 He uses his hips in one music video and suddenly he's "them" wendy4

I'm so done with this non-binary fad which ensures that male and female stereotypes keep going strong wendy4

We need more "effeminate" men and "masculine" women in the media to help all of us break out of the pigeonholes we are put into from birth wendy4

Wow. I thought I was alone in this mess dead2 

 

I was ecstatic to see Sam open up about his femininity as a gay male to normalize it but I.. Idk 

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On 9/19/2019 at 1:16 PM, Modern Woman said:

wendy4 He uses his hips in one music video and suddenly he's "them" wendy4

I'm so done with this non-binary fad which ensures that male and female stereotypes keep going strong wendy4

We need more "effeminate" men and "masculine" women in the media to help all of us break out of the pigeonholes we are put into from birth wendy4

 

On 9/16/2019 at 5:06 PM, Kyoteki said:

I agree I am part of the people who do not understand, even when told. I have learned to respect decisions, even though I do not understand it. I always am happy that people are discovering themselves.

However, personally, I view it as putting themselves in another gender box to escape another. Like they see themselves as both masculine and feminine, so non binary exists, but in reality. ... Boxes shouldn't exist period. You can be a male and dress feminine and not be called "Non Binary" and vice versa. 

Idk maybe I need more understanding of what non-binary is. 

It's not a popular opinion on here, but I agree with you.

LGBTQ+ people and their allies who have questions about non-binary identities usually aren't doing it out of malice, and I'm sure most of them would use people's preferred pronouns and terminology out of respect just like they would for nicknames. They have genuine concerns about some of its problematic implications (some of which you guys have stated in your posts) and what that means for their community, as well as other social movements like feminism. Many of them have done the research and asked questions, or even previously identified as non-binary themselves (I've never shared this before, but I have), and still feel as though they haven't gotten clear answers about things. Members of a marginalized group shouldn't be vilified for questioning an ideology that in their minds would make them even further marginalized, regardless of whether or not you agree with their stance. You haven't lived the same experiences that they have in order to get to that point, and even if you have we all process things differently.

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On 9/21/2019 at 2:40 PM, Kyoteki said:

Wow. I thought I was alone in this mess dead2 

 

I was ecstatic to see Sam open up about his femininity as a gay male to normalize it but I.. Idk 

And here was me thinking I would get DRAGGEDt for my comments.

What a month it's been for trendy genders and sexualities, whew nat2

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On 9/22/2019 at 12:47 AM, Hermione said:

 

It's not a popular opinion on here, but I agree with you.

LGBTQ+ people and their allies who have questions about non-binary identities usually aren't doing it out of malice, and I'm sure most of them would use people's preferred pronouns and terminology out of respect just like they would for nicknames. They have genuine concerns about some of its problematic implications (some of which you guys have stated in your posts) and what that means for their community, as well as other social movements like feminism. Many of them have done the research and asked questions, or even previously identified as non-binary themselves (I've never shared this before, but I have), and still feel as though they haven't gotten clear answers about things. Members of a marginalized group shouldn't be vilified for questioning an ideology that in their minds would make them even further marginalized, regardless of whether or not you agree with their stance. You haven't lived the same experiences that they have in order to get to that point, and even if you have we all process things differently.

Yes, I would call Sam Smith a "they" in the same way I call my friend's theyfriend (jj4) a they out of respect. (Sidenote: they (formerly she) seem to have no "masculine" attributes to speak of and spent the evening I first met them dissing their lesbian friend for being stereotypically butch just to fit in I- jj4)

Interesting that you used to identify as non-binary - what made you stop?

Growing up, I desperately wanted to be a girl. Now I'm happy being a man, I just desperately wish it was acceptable for men to wear dresses yas2

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1 hour ago, Modern Woman said:

Yes, I would call Sam Smith a "they" in the same way I call my friend's theyfriend (jj4) a they out of respect. (Sidenote: they (formerly she) seem to have no "masculine" attributes to speak of and spent the evening I first met them dissing their lesbian friend for being stereotypically butch just to fit in I- jj4)

Interesting that you used to identify as non-binary - what made you stop?

Growing up, I desperately wanted to be a girl. Now I'm happy being a man, I just desperately wish it was acceptable for men to wear dresses yas2

Honestly, reading about radical feminism was what made me change my mind. I know that it sometimes veers into actual transphobia and I obviously don't mean those parts, but it woke me up to how much we still hold onto antiquated gender roles even in (I would now argue especially in) "woke" communities. I realized I had fallen into the trap of thinking man and woman are collections of stereotypes, and neither set one hundred percent fit me so I must be neither. Letting go of that idea allowed me to be so much more comfortable with myself. I don't need to change my pronouns and I can still be a he/him, while just expanding the definition of what that means. I know it doesn't happen the same way for everyone though so this is just my experience. I never had gender dysphoria and the driving force was more so frustration at society, so perhaps it was easier for me to drop it.

 

Also edited to add that radical feminism gave me clear answers about everything regarding gender, whereas third wave feminism and queer theory kind of just went in circles and fell apart whenever I thought about it critically. In my opinion, one of them holds up to logic and critical thinking and the other doesn't. Even when I asked people they either wouldn't have an answer, repeated the same platitudes over and over, or yelled at me for daring to ask questions in the first place.

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