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Wonder

My Totally Biased Album Ranking

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It took me awhile to admit to myself that I stanned Gaga. Being an almost life long Madonna stan put me at odds with her, but I admired her from afar. I came out as a Gaga stan about three years ago, right around the time I actually began to lose interest. A Star Is Born kinda got me looking at her again and now Stupid Love and Chromatica has pulled me back into being excited. So in anticipation for the release of the new album, I decided to go through and rank her albums. This is my totally, 100% biased opinion, no hint of objectivity shall be found here. I elected to not include C2C and ASIB and I also chose to do TFM independently from TF. With all that in mind, let's go!

 

5. ARTPOP
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OVERALL SCORE: 6.0/10
SONG-BY-SONG SCORES:

Spoiler

Aura - 6/10
Venus - 8/10
G.U.Y. - 6/10
Sexxx Dreams - 5/10
Jewels N’ Drugs - 1/10
MANiCURE - 7/10
Do What U Want - 5/10
ARTPOP - 8/10
Swine - 5/10
Donatella - 3/10
Fashion! - 5/10
Mary Jane Holland - 7/10
Dope - 6/10
Gypsy - 5/10
Applause - 7/10

Even as a fan, I've been an ARTPOP "hater". I used to not like a single thing about the album or the era, but over time I've warmed up to some of it. I like some of the songs on the album. Genuinely like them. And I can appreciate what she was trying to do with this album. But the results just didn't do it for me. The album's biggest sin is that it tries way too hard to be different and weird. Whereas the oddity sounds of her previous releases felt natural, here they felt manufactured and calculated. From the laughing on "Aura", the fax rap bullshit on "Jewels N' Drugs", the banal obnoxiousness of "Donatella" and the snorting on "Swine", it all just felt like way too much of a knowing attempt to make something that lived up to the album's lofty title. And because of that it all feels incredibly ungenuine. This is the coldest album of Gaga's career. Save for two songs, she offers nothing in the way of personal connection, meaningful ideas, or important and topical points. You can't really hear and feel Gaga beneath the soundscape and it makes for a negative and hollow listening experience. 

 

4. Joanne
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OVERALL SCORE: 7.6/10
SONG-BY-SONG SCORES:

Spoiler

Diamond Heart - 8/10
A-YO - 8/10
Joanne - 10/10
John Wayne - 8/10
Dancin’ in Circles - 7/10
Perfect Illusion - 8/10
Million Reasons - 7/10
Sinner’s Prayer - 7/10
Come to Mama - 6/10
Hey Girl - 7/10
Angel Down - 8/10
Grigio Girls - 8/10
Just Another Day - 7/10

From here on, we're on the albums I really, really enjoy. I wasn't enthusiastic about Joanne when it came out. I thought it was boring and pretentious with very little of note. But over the years, something has changed in me. I grew to really appreciate the album's ideas, it's simplicity, and the artistic choices that she made. More than any of her albums, this presents us Gaga as an artist rather than a pop star. The traditional instrumentation adds a lot of heart and character to the album and it stands out among her catalogue for this reason. In a lot of ways, this was Steffani and not Gaga and I'm okay with that. Not every song hits and yes it's probably her slowest album and the one that's the most of a challenge to listen to from front to back. But there are a lot of great things happening within this album and it's unfortunate that it wasn't given a proper chance. 

 

3. The Fame
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OVERALL SCORE: 7.7/10
SONG-BY-SONG SCORES:

Spoiler

Just Dance - 10/10
LoveGame - 8/10
Paparazzi - 10/10
Poker Face - 10/10
Eh, Eh (Nothing Else I Can Say) - 7/10
Beautiful, Dirty, Rich - 8/10
The Fame - 8/10
Money Honey - 6/10
Starstruck - 5/10
Boys Boys Boys - 10/10
Paper Gangsta - 8/10
Brown Eyes - 6/10
I Like It Rough - 7/10
Summerboy - 7/10
Disco Heaven - 5/10

It's hard to think back and consider how much of a shot in the arm this album was when it came out. It's rare that a debut album showcases such a clear and concise set of goals and such an identifiable image, but that's exactly what this album was. It didn't exactly branch out from the sounds that were popular at the time, but what made it stand out was how it took a familiar formula and twisted it. Gaga was able to take the sounds of the era and adapt them to her voice and contort them to fit her lofty ambitions. She never went into territory that she couldn't handle which makes this an extremely confident album. Gaga is clearly having a ton of fun with the music and she invites us all to have fun with her. It's very dated in 2020 but there's so much happening and so much fun within the runtime that it's almost unnoticeable. 

 

2. The Fame Monster
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OVERALL SCORE: 8.5/10
SONG-BY-SONG SCORES

Spoiler

Bad Romance - 10/10
Alejandro - 10/10
Monster - 8/10
Speechless - 7/10
Dance in the Dark - 10/10
Telephone - 8/10
So Happy I Could Die - 8/10
Teeth - 7/10

An EP so legendary and packed with quality that it's treated as an album. There was no warning for The Fame Monster, no indication at just how much Gaga had grown up since her debut. I would argue that this remains one of the biggest leaps in quality and vision between projects in the history of pop music. Gaga knew exactly what she wanted and what sounds she wanted to push to the mainstream on this EP and she never once fails to reach her goals. The writing is deeper and more expressive, the production is more detailed and encompassing, and the vibe is more cohesive and impressive than her debut. Each of these tracks has gone on to become classics in their own right, leaving behind nothing but fond memories. This was the moment Gaga became Gaga and because of that it remains perhaps the most important release of her career.

 

1. Born This Way
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OVERALL SCORE: 8.9/10
SONG-BY-SONG SCORES

Spoiler

Mary the Night - 10/10
Born This Way - 6/10
Government Hooker - 10/10
Judas - 10/10
Americano - 8/10
Hair - 8/10
Schiesse - 9/10
Bloody Mary - 10/10
Black Jesus + Amen Fashion - 7/10
Bad Kids - 8/10
Fashion of His Love - 7/10
Highway Unicorn (Road to Love) - 10/10
Heavy Metal Lover - 10/10
Electric Chapel - 10/10
The Queen - 8/10
You and I - 10/10
The Edge of Glory - 10/10

I wasn't excited for the album based off of the song "Born This Way". I never fed into the whole rip-off song controversy, my issues with the song all came down to the cheesy and cliche presentation of admirable ideas. But that couldn't be further from what the album as a whole turned out as. The album is, for my money, the definitive Gaga album. All of the elements that make her Gaga came together for the first time. The big and bombastic production of The Fame, the lyricism and confidence of The Fame Monster, and a newfound sense of purpose and vision came together to craft one of the most unique albums of the 21st century. It's chaotic and full of ideas, never staying on one thing for more than a single song and while it could've been a mess, it just....works. It works beautifully. 

 

 

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